Beginning

In the beginning, I was the oldest child of four born to a Baptist pastor in the Midwest. I loved my siblings, my home, reading, singing, and dancing.

There have been many new beginnings since then, giving me reason to resonate with the idea of living many lifetimes. Metaphorical or literal, I feel as though I have lived many life times. And the beginnings have sometimes been obvious and sometimes been gradual.

I moved away from home to attend a small Christian college in my home state. Though it was still extremely conservative, it was much more liberal than my family. I grew, like a small plant put in a much larger flower pot. I had no experiential knowledge of what my leaving home had done to change my family..

I graduated from college and rather than move away from the area, I stayed in the same college town, preferring connections to the friends I had made. I took a job first at the college, and then with my local church..

I dated. Each relationship was powerful for me. Each person was influential. I loved each one as much as I could and changed a bit of myself to match.

I did not find love. I was devastated by this. The more I felt for a man I had met, the more repelling I seemed to be to him.

I came to the conclusion that friendship/love (what my church taught as phileo) was my ideal. I chose a man who was a dear friend to date. Although there were many things we disagreed about, we were working at communicating. I thought it might work better than the version of the ‘true love’ story that had been handed to me.

I married him and we moved to a neighboring state to start our new life together. Once we were moved and settled, I started looking for something to occupy my time. I didn’t NEED to work, but I wanted to. I tried a job offer - it was a bad fit. And at the same time I was invited to a bible study. It seemed more rigorous than college studies and suited me to a tea! I jumped right in.

And I was good at it! I learned the ins and outs of the organization and was invited to help facilitate discussion. Eventually, I also helped lead groups of children through their classes as well.

I had two children - one on the autism spectrum and one with ADHD. Their stories and influence on me is profound and deserve their own posts.

When we moved back to our home state, I stayed involved with the bible study group. In this second class, I was also invited to lead, making it all the way up to head of the class - teaching weekly! I was thrilled!

I had two more children. I was homeschooling a couple of my little ones.

For this phase of my life, I had reached a pinnacle. Wife, mother, and teacher to a few hundred. What could possibly come next?

[To be continued]